We cannot underestimate the often devastating and tragic effects of addiction on a person’s life. Often, their bodies are negatively affected in irreversible ways, and some might never be able to live the rest of their lives without the drugs taking a toll on their physical, mental, or emotional toll well-being.
But what often gets lost in the conversation is just how the people in addicts’ lives are affected as well. We need to talk more about how substance abuse addiction can wreak havoc not just on the addict’s life, but also on the lives of the people around them, especially the kids of addicted parents.
While we need to guard against generalizations because not all lived experiences are the same, there are enough common denominators for us to make a correlation. Here are some ways parental addiction can impact their children.
They Often Become Addicts Themselves
According to the Addiction Center, when a child sees their parent addicted to drugs or alcohol, they are more than likely to develop a substance abuse disorder as well. Adult Children of Alcoholics, or ACOAs, have a higher risk of battling the same disorder that their parents did. And if the parents never get treatment, or never have the opportunity to check into a drug rehab facility, their kids are more likely to suffer the same fate or make the same choices. Unless they cut that generational trauma, they will most likely pass it on to their kids as well.
Their Ability To Go Through Life Is Impaired
As much as we wish it wasn’t the case, our formative years can greatly impact our physical, emotional, and mental well-being for the rest of our lives. Trauma research author Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, in his book The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, asserts that growing up with trauma and the stress that comes with it can harm our physiological systems and can change our bodies and brains—and that these harms can persist for the rest of our lives. Growing up with the trauma of having addicted parents can be costly to children, and their trauma might stop them from growing up with self-esteem or building healthy relationships.
They Might Encounter Developmental Problems
Young children that are being neglected by addicted parents might be more prone to developmental problems such as malnutrition, speech delays, and other cognitive functioning issues. This may be especially true in cases where a mother used and abused drugs during pregnancy. Their babies might suffer from attachment problems and birth defects. Some babies with drug-addicted also have a higher risk of sudden infant death (SID).
They Are More Likely To Develop Mental Health Disorders
When a child grows up with a parent that has a substance abuse disorder, they face higher risks for poor academic functioning and experiencing a wide array of social, behavioral, and emotional problems. And when compared with their peers, children that grow up with substance abusing parents are more likely to have depression, anxiety, oppositional behavior, aggressive behavior, and issues with their conduct. They are also more likely to have lower rates of social competence and low self-esteem.
They Become Hyper-Independent Or Overachieving
It’s entirely possible for children of addicted parents to grow up “okay” and without any of the issues above. However, they are still likely to develop certain mindsets and behaviors that are not necessarily good or healthy for them. One example is they might grow up to become hyper-independent and never know how and when to ask for help.
Because they’ve had to learn to care for themselves (and perhaps their siblings) all their lives, they learned never to rely on people, or to trust that there are good people out there who have their best interests at heart. Some might even grow up to become overachievers in an effort to prove that they are unlike their parents who struggled and failed.
It’s Never Too Late
If someone you know is struggling with a substance abuse disorder, and they have children, it’s never too late to get the help they need. Extend love and support, speak words of kindness and encouragement, and give them access to professionals and treatment that they may otherwise never search for themselves. Remind them their children need them to be healthy and alive, and that they don’t have to navigate this journey to recovery alone. Do not underestimate the power of community and support in their recovery. Your loved one—and their kids—deserves a second chance.